2008-05-19 - 10:13 p.m.
things are... bah i dunno. great opening, really gives you an idea of where this is going..(?)
i had my quantum final today. i went ok. I think i'll have a reasonable grade in that class. If I can write a kick ass paper for my field theory class and pull off an A, then overall I should be ok.
I wanted shelby to sleep with me so badly last night. and by sleep i just mean sleep (err... including but not limited to). i probably could have asked her and maybe she would. i get the feeling that she has no interest in me anymore... which is good i guess. for her especially. but i miss her like crazy... and i really think i just feel like shit and want that feeling of someone comforting me. she tried to a little bit when i saw her but i think think the fact that her phone goes off every time i see her with messages from frank, who she supposedly doesn't even like and for some reason still makes me jealous, makes her presence a lot less soothing. i just feel angry and betrayed, which again is fucking stupid. i mean suer i have been genuinely betrayed before.... this isn't like that. this is just... something i maybe took for granted that i'm now losing, her still wanting to be with me, and so now i'm missing it. i don't know if she has stopped asking me if she can come over because she doesn't want to anymore, or because she doesn't want to bother me.... or because she feels it's inappropriate because she's moving on.
i dunno, i gotta go get my delivery so maybe i'll say more later